Hand-powered Groom Mate Platinum XL nose & ear hair trimmer

The 'Groom Mate Platinum XL Nose and Ear Hair Trimmer' is not, sadly, made of platinum. But it's still clad in a affirmingly masculine stainless steel, complete with prominent screw and gnarled grips. That means it's not all that expensive, either, at just $20, shipped. Not as manly as looping your nose hairs around a doorknob then telling your significant other that you'd like to break up, but what is?

It's also tiny — just 2.6-inches long. Hopefully the TSA will understand it's not a bullet.

No batteries included, because it doesn't use them. Instead, the clippers operate by rotating the bottom of the shaft.

Catalog Page [Amazon via Shaving Stuff]

[#1 posted by Outtacontext , April 14, 2008 7:00 AM]

You have such a nice way with words. Ouch!

[#2 posted by John Brownlee , April 14, 2008 7:04 AM]

You've got to twist it for it to work? That dog won't hunt. These engorged tentacles slithering out of my nasal cavities aren't exactly the gossamer nasal lanugo of a neonate, you know.

[#3 posted by jennfrank , April 14, 2008 11:10 AM]

A coworker once pulled me into Walgreens, trying to decide between this 'personal groomer' or that one. I wasn't much help. When we walked to his apartment he, not really in a teasing way, offered to let me use it next. I recoiled. Also, it didn't seem like it would fit in my nostril.

I mentioned it once at work, and he denied it.

[#4 posted by jennfrank , April 14, 2008 11:16 AM]

P.S. I think what Mr Brownlee is getting at is, if this trimmer doesn't use electricity, chances are it also does the old catch-and-tug (see also). Nothing more painful.

[#5 posted by John Brownlee , April 14, 2008 11:38 AM]

Actually, Jenn, I'm just saying that for MY nose hairs, a gas-powered chainsaw is the tool of minimum requirement. Flamethrowers also work, but exacerbate my hayfever.

[#6 posted by License Farm , April 14, 2008 2:13 PM]

Am I the only one to whom this resembles nothing so much as a lightsaber's hilt? That might be the happy medium to Brownlee's need for a flamethrower.

[#7 posted by Knife Knut , April 14, 2008 3:41 PM]

I suggest a big ol' bowie!

[#8 posted by Anonymous , April 15, 2008 1:17 AM]

Joel: I think the word you're looking for is knurled, not gnarled. I'd want to know if I made that kind of mistake.

Knurl:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Knurling

Gnarl:
http://www.hdprint.co.uk/ftp/Colorado/368%20-%20Gnarled%20old%20tree.jpg

[#9 posted by Joel Johnson , April 15, 2008 3:38 AM]

Oh, well, "gnarled" still sort of works, but yeah, that is probably the word I was looking for. That's too similar to not have heard of it. Knurled. I like it. Thanks!

[#10 posted by cha0tic , April 15, 2008 7:00 PM]

I'm sure it could be usefully modded to a powder snorting device.

[#11 posted by Anonymous , October 10, 2008 3:17 PM]

hey...i bought one of these. f----g awesome gadget dudes. i threw my piece of shit battery operated trimmers in the can.