Inside "Dave's Adjustable Hot Sauce" bottle are two chambers, one filled with scorching hot sauce fit only for braggarts and masochists, while the other holds a mixture barely hot enough to merit the name. Click the dial at the top to select your preferred place on the Scoville scale and then give it a press; the commingled sauce will spray out like mace all over your Mexican breakfast.
Inspired, I've created a similar product for French fries that allows you to select your preferred mixture of malt vinegar and mayonnaise. I'll release it once I figure out how to aerosolize mayonnaise, after which I'll replace the malt vinegar with more mayonnaise.
It's $10, plus shipping.