Associated Press reviews Sony’s Rolly. Verdict: It Sucks Eggs.

rollie.jpg

One could procedurally generate AP ledes describing how Sony lost the portable music market it created. A computer, however, could never generate gloriously spiteful remarks like “it’s a conversation-starter if your dancing hamster has run off” and “like all eggs, it’s hard to figure out the point.” Bravo!

Between calling it a dumber R2-D2 and bringing Peter Fabergé into it, Rachel Metz points out other flaws in the cute but catastophically-expensive music player, such as the lack of a headphone socket(!) and its tiny 2GB of memory. The verdict? “The world’s most advanced (and expensive) cat toy.”

Review: Sony’s Rolly not quite love at first dance [AP]

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13 Responses to Associated Press reviews Sony’s Rolly. Verdict: It Sucks Eggs.

  1. Keith says:

    What’s the point of an MP# player without a headphone jack? or is this one of those “If you build it, they will come” moves, where it only works on SONY brand bluetooth ear buds? either way, silly.

  2. Anonymous says:

    Mayhaps basing your mp3 players on favourite food items is third time lucky, hmm Sony?

  3. Symphonix says:

    I can’t help but wonder if this is one of those examples of a major corporation doing something deliberately, eye-catchingly stupid in order to increase “mindshare” “search engine rankings” and so on.

    Just imagine how many blogs, sites and reputable reviewers have written about this little gadget; often using phrases like “Sony claims that this is the ‘best media player ever made’”. If 200 bloggers put that quote on their blogs, then what happens next time someone Googles “best media player ever made”? What happens to Sony’s struggling mindshare?

    Either that, or they designed this little gadget *on purpose* actually believing it would be a hit. If thats the case … Ouch.

  4. David D. says:

    I went to Sony’s website to look for something else yesterday, and was confronted with a big demo video for this. I watched transfixed, waiting for the other shoe to drop. Waiting. Waiting.

    Nope. It’s a hyperactive plastic turd.

    If I was on drugs and that thing wheeled past me, I’d scream and kill it with my shoe.

  5. Anonymous says:

    Sony, Sony, Sony… will this company ever pull it’s head out of its a** and realize that stupid products and really lousy customer service is not the way to success? My bet is no, they won’t. They’ve been going down this same path for so many years now, I think it’s totally ingrained behaviour. Idiots.

  6. Enochrewt says:

    #4: If people read a blog that said it’s the “Best media player ever made” they’d laugh and say “No! That’s the iPod!” (even if it isn’t). People are dumb, but they’re not that dumb.

  7. magic whiskey says:

    I’d chuck it like a football into the garbage.(I;m sure the disgruntled designers had that exact idea in mind.)

    Sony, once again, has cried out for help that will never come. Let it commit suicide already.

  8. Anonymous says:

    Just saw a promo video on Dailymotion for this and thought it must be a joke product, then just had to Google it, and there I was confronted with it taking the limelight at Sony’s website……I accept they will need to come up with something revolutionary to win back sales lost to the iPod but really this is not it – how about something that has more functionality actually based around music playback guys, this is just going to get annoying after about 5 minutes.

    This is the sort of rubbish I’d expect to see from some manufacturer you’d never heard of selling for about £40, I like Sony, love the PSP, I’m sure I’d love the PS3 (for Blu-ray alone)had I not have gone down the 360 route but they have really lost the plot with this one…..I wait to stand corrected when they sell out but I don’t think there will be a rush at the shops, maybe another case where actors will be paid to queue outside the shops as was the case when the 3G iPhone hit Poland this week!

  9. Agies says:

    More proof that if Blu-Ray had faled Sony would be screwed.

  10. Fnarf says:

    I’m speechless. How many people were on the committee that designed this elephant?

  11. klobouk says:

    The review misses the point. This isn’t an ipod.
    It’s meant to be used by people on drugs.
    Chances are, if you’re not high on something, you wouldn’t bother buying this in the first place.

  12. Anonymous says:

    Calling it the most advanced and expensive cat toy will guarantee it sells at least 25,000 units. Crazy cat people are craaaaaaaaazy.

  13. Jake0748 says:

    I’ve been hating and avoiding anything Sony since the whole rootkit thing (well before that actually).

    This has to be the stupidest thing ever made. It will either:
    a) sink immediately, like a stone, or
    b) find some kind of following among some segment of sad losers.

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