Three-player table tennis offers intrinsically imbalanced larks

Fancy a game of three-player ping pong? Just imagine the exquisitely hateful arguments one could get into over this. It starts with jolliness and camaraderie. Fun. As play progresses, however, and one player starts to trail, the atmosphere changes, slipping imperceptibly to frustration and unease. A suggestion is made to occasionally swap positions; declined, the air darkens still further. A cigarette "forgotten" on one corner inflicts passive-aggressive revenge. Rule disputes are arbitrated with snide remarks. Uncouth language is used. The decisive "hit the ping pong ball so hard it bounces into the ceiling" technique is employed. Decades of sublimated hatred boil to the surface. Product Page Source [Next Big Thing via SlipperyBrick and Dvice]

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8 Responses to Three-player table tennis offers intrinsically imbalanced larks

  1. kaiza says:

    Surely a circular table divided into three would make a lot more sense?

  2. randalll says:

    haha, i have lots of childhood memories of knock-down drag-outs with my two older brothers over games of ping-pong.

    also, wiffle balls wrapped in 3 lbs of duct tape. i still have the scars.

  3. help i cant comfirm my username themelonbread says:

    You know, the game of Go is intrinsically imbalanced, as being the one to move first has been determined to give you a 1 to 7-stone lead, depending on how good the player is. The rules counteract this by allowing either a handicap of stones already on the board for player 2, or giving them a certain number of points at the end.

  4. themindfantastic says:

    Okay… the middle player has signifigant advantage… one edge and not much movement, while the ends have two edges and they are corners which will get snagged upon in the most painful way possible I am sure. Not particularly fair.

  5. ZombieBabyDiego says:

    menage a’ pong?

  6. Jake0748 says:

    This looks hilarious.

  7. keef says:

    @themindfantasic: I think the middle player might have the edge and movement advantage, as you say, but won’t they be hitting the ball twice as much as either of the end players? I assume the play would move from one end, to the middle, to the other end, and then back to the middle.

  8. Enochrewt says:

    Yeah those corners look very dangerous. Like you could catch the vas deferens on them.

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