As I increasingly try to introduce exercise and Vitamin D into my blogger’s lifestyle, one of the things I miss most are my suppurating bed sores. Those guys and I really had some fantastic adventures. They didn’t ask for much — a lancing here or there, the occasional slathering of ointment or table salt — but they were always there for me… a persistent burning, oozing sensation that my brief flings with promiscuous floozies informs me is very similar to the sensation of what you norms might call “love.” Charlie, Ralph, Gwyneth, Chase: I know I buried you alive under pink skin and bristling musculature, and for that I am eternally sorry. I will never forget our many fond times together.
Still, when we were all together, my bed sores and I, I can’t help but think we would have all appreciated this swiveling notebook stand. It really needs a built-in mini-fridge and built-in catheter and colostomy bag to be useful to the successful professional blogger. Even without, though, it helps afford one less reason to get out of bed every morning… just reach over, pull your laptop towards you and it’s time for the professional Control+C/Control+V monkey to hit the feeds and earn his millions. At under $300, not a bad investment for a blogger or an MMORPG guild master.