Sexy Star Wars stormtrooper boots

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Come-fuck-me boots for the fashion-conscious Imperial set, as designed by Rupert Sanderson for the Fashion Fringe Shoe competition. A casual Google image search reveals I’m not the only one who has nuzzled a passionate fantasy of PVC Death Star fumblings with a sexy female stormtrooper in both my brain and nethers ever since my pre-pubertal sexuality was awakened while watching the The Empire Strikes Back… although, in truth, the subsequent revelation that every stormtrooper was a clone of Jango Fett has put the dampers on that fantasy somewhat.

Walk in Space [Style Bubble via Gizmodo]

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16 Responses to Sexy Star Wars stormtrooper boots

  1. eustace says:

    #3 made me spew coffee. Gee thanks.
    And some of the women beyond the link in #7 would benefit from the shoe. Some are doing awfully well without it, though. My goodness.

  2. Marshall says:

    Cockerham for the win!

  3. eustace says:

    High heels automatically come with problematic aim.

  4. JDspeeder1 says:

    Fear not, geekpervs, for I, obsessive Star Wars nitpicker, am here to save your overly-specific fantasies. Ahem. **puts on his standard-issue professorial smoking jacket and tiny glasses.**

    While the initial wave of Imperial Stormtroopers were cloned from the DNA of Mandalorian bounty hunter Jango Fett, the forces of the Stormtrooper Corps were henceforth supplemented by clones of other human males and human males recruited in the traditional manner (http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Stormtrooper#History paragraph 2).

    Of particular note is that by 130 ABY (the “current” era of newly released Star Wars material), the Stormtrooper Corps had become a co-ed, species-diverse military force (http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Stormtrooper#History paragraph 9). At this time, one Jes Gistang served in the 407th Stormtrooper Division as heavy weapons specialist of Joker Squad under Darth Krayt’s Sith Empire. She was, regrettably, killed in action at the Battle of Borosk (http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Jes_Gistang).

    With this irrefutable evidence, we can come to the conclusion that one would be entirely within one’s rights to hold, and fap to, the aforementioned predilection.

  5. ThinkandDrive says:

    John, please seek help. Seriously. ;)

  6. eustace says:

    Thank you Jedi Speeder, for meeting my rationalization needs :)

  7. Tensegrity says:

    Yes, but what about the 69th Imperial Legion cloned from Janga Fett.

  8. Anonymous says:

    Storm troopers are not all clones of Jango Fett, the Kaminoans stoped producing them between the third and fourth films, now they are all recruits for the empire, so you could get a female one I suppose. You should read some of the expanded universe novels, they pretty much fill in the bulk of what isn’t in the films.

  9. Rob Cockerham says:

    Would that make it a Fett footish?

  10. Anonymous says:

    But do they come with bad aim?

  11. mr.skeleton says:

    It also reminds me much of the mass-produced Evas from End of Evangelion, the white fish-faced ones (Neon Genesis Evangelion being an anime from the 90s, if you don’t know).

    That’s right, I just geeked it up a notch.

  12. Enochrewt says:

    Why do I immediately envision being punted in the meatsack when I see these shoes? Maybe it’s the shoehorn-like instep that would cup a man so fiercely.

  13. JDspeeder1 says:

    Well played, Eustace.

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