Batman-style beer belt doesn’t look marathon-ready

With Balkan dictator Slobodan Milošević now safely dead, the idea of a superhero named “Slob-man” has finally lost its Serbo-nationalistic cachet and returned to its natural linguistic place. This place is best embodied by the Beerbelt from Urban Outfitters, a creation so obviously bad that it can barely be made to hang properly for a professional photo-shoot. Awesomeness overcomes much, however, and I think we can be swayed.

Adam West’s party surprise is yours for $18.

The Beer Belt [Urban Outfitters]

1. [zuzu]

   Titanya: But Duffman, you said if I slept with you I wouldn’t have to touch the drunk!
   Duffman: Duff Man says a lot of things! Oh yeah!

2. [Lagbert]

   What?!!?!? No built in bottle opener!!!! Typical of urban outfitters – they pretend to be hip and indy, but when it comes to beer they show their true mass produced twist off cap colors.

3. [Lagbert]

   RE: #3

   There are only a few reasons to carry a lighter:

   You smoke – cancerous and lame!
   You are a 14 year old who thinks it’s cool to play with a zippo – juvenile and lame!
   You are an arsonist – illegal and lame!

4. [Anonymous]

   I wonder who they stole this idea from? http://urbncounterfeiters.blogspot.com/

   #2: Right – they expect you to buy a “kitsch” (ie mass-produced crap) GWB talking bottle opener.

5. [hemidemisemiquaver]

   Psh, bottle opener. Unless you’re totally lame, you’ll just use a lighter to open your beer. Urban Outfitters knows this.

6. [ROSSINDETROIT]

   7.5 lbs. I just weighted a bottle of Great Lakes Brewing Dortmunder Gold on a postal scale. It’s precisely 1.25 lbs, which means if you sling a six of those around your waist you’re hauling seven and a half pounds on your belt.
   I wouldn’t do it.

7. [zuzu]

   There are only a few reasons to carry a lighter

   Apparently you’ve never:

   * lived in an apartment with a gas stove but broken ignitors

   * gone camping (or even used a fireplace)

   * been interested in making a pass at someone who does smoke

   * set off fireworks

8. [gwizah]

   This is retarded. Every red blooded ‘Merican should know a six-pack can be carried easily with just a belt. Just take out a can, loop the belt thru the hole and go to town (jail).

9. [Bruce Arthurs]

   Molotov Cocktail Suicide Belt

10. [knifie_sp00nie]

    Only 6 beers? The right model of Utilikilt can hold up to 20!

    http://www.utilikilts.com/index.php?page_id=31

11. [Halloween Jack]

    Extra humor-value-added points for their using a slim female model, pretty much exactly the opposite of the person who would buy one of these.