Intel: Nehalem is now Core i7

intel-core-i7.jpg

Intel’s upcoming Nehalem architecture is officially getting a new name: Core i7. Insiders tell BBG that Nehalem fell out of favor after testing groups thought it “too Jewish.”* Intel’s fervently Hassidic corporate culture will be downplayed by the new branding, although not be eliminated entirely: our sources tell us that the i stands for “Isaiah” while the 7 indicates the number of Ushpizzin who visit the sukkah during the holiday of Sukkot.

Intel changes Nehalem to Core i7 [Intel]

* – Wrong. They were, of course, thinking of the Nephilim, not the Nehalem.

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13 Responses to Intel: Nehalem is now Core i7

  1. Bruce Arthurs says:

    From what I read in the Wikipedia link, they could have called it Tillamook instead.

    But that would have been too cheesy.

  2. trr says:

    A river in Oregon it is indeed, which is also where Intel’s logic development fab, D1D, is. They probably wanted to name it Squaw Creek, but they changed the name of that stream already, to avoid certain connotations.

  3. royaltrux says:

    It does have roots in the Pentium M, which was developed in Israel, as far as I know.

  4. zuzu says:

    According to Wikipedia,

    As the M line was originally designed in Israel, the first Pentium M was identified by the codename Banias, named after an ancient site in the Golan Heights.

    …which is a little fucked since Israel forcibly annexed the Golan Heights from Syria.

  5. lunarworks says:

    I thought it was a Hebrew name as well, it sounds like one for sure, but it’s actually the name of a tribe of Native Americans and a river in Oregon.

  6. Eicos says:

    Yeah, real fucked. Poor Syria. There they were in 1967, just minding their own business, and then mean ol’ Israel came out of nowhere and took away all their toys. Oh wait…

  7. zuzu says:

    while the number 7 indicates the number of Ushpizzin who visit the sukkah during the holiday of Sukkot.

    Is that the one where they go in the tent?

  8. nprnncbl says:

    Isaiah, though, is already taken, by VIA, along with Ezra, Samuel, Esther, Joshua, Eden, and Nehemiah. What else could “i” possibly stand for?

    And Zuzu, if by tent you meant sukkah , then yes. If you meant something more Kafkaesque, then no.

  9. kevin143 says:

    Hey, I have a great idea, let’s solve the Israel/Palestine dispute by arguing on the internet.

  10. w000t says:

    When will people realize that all of the Abrahamic chipmakers (yes, even AMD, PBUH) worship the same electrons?

  11. wangleberry says:

    thats a really crap name.
    its the same name as 1 of the 5 networks in my country (au), (the crappest and least watchable one)

  12. zuzu says:

    There they were in 1967, just minding their own business, and then mean ol’ Israel came out of nowhere and took away all their toys. Oh wait…

    Because if the military invasion and occupation of Iraq by the USA has demonstrated anything, it’s that pre-emptive strikes are justified. Oh wait…

  13. themindfantastic says:

    I always was the one to prefer the codewords for a product instead what they eventually get called I mean Microsoft Windows LONGHORN! Thats a NAME! Or Intel’s Clackamas Chip.

    People refereed to its operating systems after big cats which is AWESOME, Im using LEOPARD! Thats gotta rev up the testosterone!

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