Sitting on the balcony with a beer, my mobile phone rings.
"Hello, John Brownlee speaking."
"Uh... ja... hallo. This is E-Plus calling. You have a mobile phone with us?"
"Indeed I do. What's this about?"
"Ja, Herr Brownlee. We like you..."
"So we like to give you second SIM card. You can give it to a partner of your choice and speak to them for free at any time!"
"That's very kind of you, but I'm afraid I don't have a person to give that SIM Card to."
"Oh. What a pity. You have no one. How terribly sad. I hope you find a lover one day. We will call you then."
I decide I need to open a few more beers.