There is scarcely any chance that this peanut butter maker can actually deliver the gorgeous protein waterfall pictured in the product shot — it’s simply too perfect, the deluge of peanut butter too gushing, luscious and gooey — but if I ever wanted to push my tongue directly through my monitor’s LCD membrane and lick at a dripping brown font on the other side, this is the time.
Lighter Side’s Peanut Butter Machine does exactly what its name implies, in either chunky or smooth, and can be used for other varieties of nuts besides. $49.98, but I’m almost just tempted to get a Giclee print of the picture and hang it on my kitchen wall: although peanut butter technology has certainly advanced in the century since George Washington Carver traveled back through time to gift it to us from the future, I simply can not believe any device can deliver peanut butter as mana-like as in this picture. This is a photograph of the Platonic Ideal of peanut butter making machines: I can not believe it is the actuality.
Peanut Butter Machine [Lighter Side via Gearfuse]
The reality is lots of cleanup afterwards — you can stop licking the monitor now.
It’s peanut butter, you’ll be sick of it in five minutes.
Strider, I know you’re a good guy, but YOU CAN GO RIGHT TO HELL if you think I’ll ever get tired of peanut butter. I could never forsake my dark mistress.
For some reason ’2 Girls 1 Cup’ comes to mind..
It will take me over 15 years to make this cost-effective.
Expect an ironic 2 piece hipster band (melodica and congas? Optigan and tablas?) called Protein Waterfall to materialize somewhere in the midwest by the end of the day.
There’s more to peanut butter than just peanuts.
single purpose kitchen gadget = BAD
Buy a decent blender, done.
One of the many advantages of having super-strength is that, any time I want fresh home-made peanut butter, I just squeeze the nuts. If I squeeze too hard, though, I get a peanut-butter-colored diamond, which is pretty ugly. It takes practice.
I’m a little scared of Mr. Brownlee now.
I was weaned on artificially sweetened peanut butter chock full of additives, natural peanut butter just tastes kind of nasty.
FINALLY, NOW I CAN BUILD MY PEANUT BUTTER ENEMA ROBOT!
I’ve made peanut butter several times. It’s an incredibly difficult thing to do. You have to put peanuts in a blender, and then blend them. It is also very runny after having done so since the peanut butter is so warm. I have no doubt that it would come out in that waterfall of goodness you see in the picture.
“There’s more to peanut butter than just peanuts.”
No, no there isn’t. Peanut flavored spread has more ingredients, but peanut butter doesn’t. (Okay, yes, they still call it peanut butter, but I don’t think they should.)
The few times I’ve had natural peanut butter I’ve been pretty disappointed. I’m definitely a JIF man. chemicals be damned.
looks like extruded poo
I am so with you on wanting to lick that stream of freshly made peanut butter. I buy the natural, need to stir, creamy variety.
Nothing is more satisfying for breakfast than toasted whole wheat bread, creamy natural peanut butter, a drizzle of raw honey and sliced banana.
I hope you get lucky and the company sends you a Peanut Butter Machine to review.
I guess it’s really the sugar that bothers me about the “unnatural” peanut butter. I’m a freak in that I highly prefer salty to sugary. And regular peanut butter is s-w-e-e-t. Like that toxic stew they have the nerve to refer to as “hazelnut spread” – Nutella. It’s not a hazelnut spread; it’s an oil and sugar spread with a token amount of hazelnuts in it.
(Okay, I like it every now and then, but I hate myself afterwards.)
What bothers me is that they add Canola Oil to it. That shit makes you go blind.
There’s a reason they don’t call it Rape Seed anymore…
There was an all natural peanut butter called, get this, “Real Peanut Butter” (Real was the brand name), that was AWESOME, better than any peanut butter I’ve had, yes, including Jif. And by natural peanut butter, I don’t mean like that Kraft natural under a centimeter of oil and tastes bad kind of natural. This one also had to be refrigerated.
Why do I tell you all this?
I CAN’T FIND IT ANYMORE. If anybody’s heard of it, I really want to know…
“REAL Peanut Butter” is the only brand of peanut butter I will buy. I live in Nebraska & most of the stores here carry it in the dairy case.
I bought a jar two weeks ago at my local HyVee in Bethany, Missouri. It was the last one. When I went back yesterday, they were sill out. I didn’t have time to ask them why. I hope the company has not gone out of business.
I can’t find REAL brand peanut butter either. I was searching the internet to find out what has happened to it, when I found your comments. I’m desperate! I must have my REAL peanut butter in the glass jar. No plastic for me. And I can’t stand fake peanut butter with shortening in it. Has anyone heard what happened to Real?
Dido – I used to buy REAL at a local store – can’t find it for the past couple of months! What happened?
Are we eating peanuts again? Wasn’t there a disease or something on them? I thought I overheard this on every television in America, around the clock a few weeks ago.