Slim Chips: zero calorie potato chips made out of flavored paper

Fighting the creeping gelatination of my late twenties, I have often lamented the lack of zero calorie food: there's just so many saltines and mustard a man can eat. So while everything I know about nutrition is recoiling at this line of calorieless chips by Icelandic designer Hafsteinn Júlíusson, my inner ectomorph is begging the hambeast that swallowed him to order a case. Slim Chips are made of edible, non-toxic paper and flavored in peppermint, blueberry and sweet potato. And what a pitch! "Instead of getting fat you can now eat paper with different flavors. It's like eating tasty air." Tasty air! I love that stuff. Concept only for right now, alas, but it does bring up an excellent dieting suggestion : why not start slathering mustard on scraps of A4? Slim Chips [Artist's Site via Book of Joe]
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20 Responses to Slim Chips: zero calorie potato chips made out of flavored paper

  1. mdh says:

    Probably tastes better than the mud-cakes Haitians have been eating for the last few months.

  2. Droogy says:

    Saltines have calories. And carbs. Sorry.

  3. broklynite says:

    What really astonishes me is the concept that the flavors I would want in a potato chip would be peppermint, blueberry and sweet potato and not, oh, lets say – salty origional (salt has no calories), barbeque, and sour creme and onion. Or ranch. Or nacho cheese. nope, peppermint, blueberry and sweet potato is it.

    Just a thought. Do these companies ever think to talk to fat bloated bastards like me?

  4. broklynite says:

    Come to think of it, this reminds me of a strip from Sexy Losers (NSFW)

  5. altgrave says:

    @6 i suspect that your normal sort of paper (even without toxic handling) is largely indigestible cellulose, so that, if it doesn’t just, ahem, go right through you, it would result in burning something that couldn’t possibly put fat on you – a net loss, in other words. just a guess, though.

  6. Anonymous says:

    I can’t believe that these new potato chips are that good. Actually, I have heard that after eating them you should consume some other products to make your body recover from them. As far as I know the solaray st johns wort hypericin are recommended in this case.

  7. strider_mt2k says:

    I’ll stick to peanut butter smeared on a playing card thank you very much. :|

  8. pork musket says:

    Mustard on saltines? My lunch of tuna on reduced fat wheat thins challenges you to a duel!

  9. Not a Doktor says:

    What happened to gum?

  10. clueless in brooklyn says:

    Why not just sprinkle the flavoring on your hand and suck on it? Or maybe another apendage?

    Or better yet, eating a moderate amount of regular chips.

  11. MarlboroTestMonkey7 says:

    Remember to swim the jar of lard at the bottom of the package!

  12. Tommy says:

    So, do these count as fiber?

  13. Joel Johnson says:

    We need to find out what paper he’s using and make our own!

  14. Chevan says:

    But strictly speaking, doesn’t paper have calories?

    If you want to be completely accurate, yes, paper has calories.

    But they’re not worth mentioning – the calories are locked up in a form that’s entirely indigestible for our bodies. It’ll pass right through you more or less intact.

  15. bardfinn says:

    To literally answer a rhetorical question (or was it? This is a gadget blog):

    Why not eat A4 paper?

    Most not-for-foodservice paper is manufactured with harsh chemicals, including sodium hydroxide and sodium hypochloride (lye and bleach), may contain fillers (gelatin, clay, titanium dioxide, plastic), acid-neutralizers, and the cellulose may just be a feast for bacteria living in your large intestine (end result: gaseous hydrocarbons!).

    If you desire a suitable ROHS-compliant salt substrate substitute to Corn and Potato, then Pumpkin Seeds are excellent.

  16. Cloudform says:

    Neat! But strictly speaking, doesn’t paper have calories? A calorie is a measure of heat, and I’m sure it takes energy to digest wood pulp–termites need food too.

    Incidentally, I want a puffed snack that is ring-shaped and bbq flavored, with a sunglass- and gold chain- wearing insect for the mascot. They could be called Mesquite-Os.

  17. MarlboroTestMonkey7 says:

    Could this be rice paper? The site doesn’t tell, I’ll stick to laser grade for now.

  18. mgfarrelly says:

    “Don’t get fat just eat nothing !”

    Oh dear. The final line in reductionist logic.

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