Hentai NVIDIA card reveals new benchmark standard in GPU processing

Posted by John Brownlee, September 15, 2008 10:03 AM | permalink

We will not claim that this hentai brandedi GeForce 8800 GT card, initially spotted by a member of the Fucked Gaijin forums, is real. It is almost certainly a PhotoShop. That said, as GPUs get more and more powerful, what could be a better showcase for a graphic card's polygon-pumping might than the cel-shaded depiction of a hydrocephalic Japanese pre-teen's cervix, her realistic mucous membrane providing an impressive testing ground for Nvidia's revolutionary fluidic physics processing?

Thank you, Japan. We look forward to the introduction of the Cartoon Cervix Scale in the next version of 3D Mark.

Elsa Gladiac NVIDIA GeForce 8800 GT [Fucked Gaijin]

posted in:

Favorite this!

Older Tetris bathroom tiles

Newer Verizon's mildly sexist "cellphone for the ladies" ad, annotated

Discussion

Take a look at this

#1 posted by mujadaddy , September 15, 2008 10:17 AM

This post makes me feel dirty.

Keep up the good work.

Take a look at this

#2 posted by Enochrewt , September 15, 2008 11:01 AM

Wow, that boxart is dirty.

Take a look at this

#3 posted by Jake0748 , September 15, 2008 11:10 AM

Well, you don't really need a fancy video card to look at hentai, upskirt (or any other kind of) porn on the intertubes.

Take a look at this

#4 posted by HeatherB , September 15, 2008 12:40 PM

Somewhere out there, there is a fella who is happy because he got to slide her in.

Take a look at this

#5 posted by reflex , September 15, 2008 12:48 PM

Jesus, Brownlee. Don't take this as encouragement, but I was laughing so hard I couldn't breathe for a minute or two.

Take a look at this

#6 posted by Anonymous , September 15, 2008 12:50 PM

Elsa was a german manufacturer of PC components in the last century. They went extinct somewhen before the era of AGP graphic cards.

Take a look at this

#7 posted by monopole , September 15, 2008 1:31 PM

Jake0748 #3
Sure you don't need a GPU to watch hentai.
But what about Dating Simulations?

and Augmented Reality Cybermaid Molestation:
http://gadgets.boingboing.net/2008/07/21/cybermaid-molestatio.html

and The PC port of Half Elf Tentacle Assault:
http://gadgets.boingboing.net/2008/07/24/halfelf-tentacle-ass.html
(Better get a Hentai branded Cintiq too!)

Finally, beta testers of the new Hello Kitty's Futanari Adventure MMO report the need for Crysis level hardware and a Physics Processor to render the tentacles in full quality.

Take a look at this

#8 posted by dculberson , September 15, 2008 2:09 PM

@Anon #6, I had an Elsa AGP graphics and video capture card. (The "Victory Erazer," whatever that means.) So they did have at least some AGP cards.

Take a look at this

#9 posted by DrJen , September 15, 2008 10:11 PM

Um...er...um. I'm not sure why this post bothers me more than most. I guess it's because this is not(admittedly) really a gadget, but a probable photoshop, so the posting is just an excuse to put up a really young-looking cartoon doing whatever. Anyway, bleh.

Take a look at this

#10 posted by Daemon , September 15, 2008 11:00 PM

For those wondering, the girl on the box is a hentai adaption of Louise, the female lead of the not remotely hentai series Zero No Tsukaima, based on a japanese light novel series of the same name.

Take a look at this

#11 posted by Not a Doktor , September 16, 2008 12:21 AM

Well this looks better than normal box-art that the same creative team makes that brought you this music video

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H25lz7gchaw

Take a look at this

#12 posted by frankiez