Power On Self Test: “made of long hole”

[via Qt3]

1. [pupdog]

   It seems they don’t trust their contractors too much in Beverly – check out the free of ‘mud, tar, barnacles, or any sort of manure’ so that the pipe doesn’t get painted dirty and have lumps, and the labeling reqs. for ‘long’ and ‘large’ pipes…

2. [devophill]

   Text size tags fell in a hole? ?? I’m looking at you, Transmothra.

3. [Anonymous]

   Missing a </small> in the [via Qt3]

4. [Garr]

   lol, the outer diameter must exceed the inner diameter to prevent the hole from being outside the pipe

   Well, no wonder they resort to humor. I would too if I had to write a boring script like that.

5. [Daniel Rutter]

   Also, “When ordering 90 degree or 30 degree elbows, be sure to specify right hand or left hand…”

   (There’s a pseudo-canonical version of this piece here.)

   See also the classic Tools Defined. There’s also the famous turboencabulator, which has been mentioned on boingboing before.

6. [growf]

   Wow. The first time I saw this was on an old mimeograph in the basement of a friend’s house sometime in the Eighties. It was credited to Hydroflo Tubecraft Ltd and Peter Monk…whoever they are.

   Clauses missing here include:

   All acid-proof pipe is to be made of acid-proof metal.

   All pipe is to be supplied with nothing in the hole so that water, steam, or other stuff can be put inside at a later date.

   All pipe fittings are to be made of the same stuff as the pipe.

   All pipe closers are to be open at one end.

   No fittings are to be put on pipe unless specified. If you do, straight pipe becomes crooked pipe.

7. [Anonymous]

   Ceci n’est pas une pipe!

   - René Magritte

8. [transmothra]

   “the Outer Diameter of pipe will exceed the Inner Diameter to avoid the hole being on the outside.”

   Priceless!

9. [zikman]

   I like you guys
   I wish I could work for/with you