Prevent cancer with the USB Eyeball Massager

Posted by John Brownlee, October 3, 2008 2:12 AM |
usb-eye-massager.jpg

"The usuage of this product is very simple," the USB Eye Massager's official homepage promises. Simply plug it into the USB port and flick between three settings. Apply to pupils, Mo Howard style. This will stimulate both the "central nervous system and the autonomic (involuntary) nervous system", as well as increase the production of saliva and the flow of digestive juices. It even kicks the lymphatic system into overdrive, "protecting against viruses and degenerative diseases." There's no price listed, unfortunately, but with such incredible medical benefits, I assume it will be attractively priced for the bulk consumption of numerous multi-billion dollar HMOs.

USB Eye Massager [Sundayo via Foolish Gadgets]

posted in: Health ,  Junk
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Discussion

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#1 posted by pupdog , October 3, 2008 2:57 AM

Yes, it's for 'eyeball' stimulation. Uhhuh...

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#2 posted by John Brownlee , October 3, 2008 3:05 AM

WHAT ARE YOU IMPLYING, SIR?

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#3 posted by DeWynken , October 3, 2008 7:21 AM

Somehow getting DP'd by my Gateway doesn't appeal.

I bet Mac users will flip over this though..

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#4 posted by OM Author Profile Page, October 3, 2008 8:31 AM

...Ok, if you flip it over, is it marketable in Englandland?

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