Crystal Head Vodka may not promote clear thinking

I'm pretty sure Dan Aykroyd is insane. But at least it's the kind of insanity that produces beautiful glass bottles in the shape of a human skull, each filled with his own Crystal Head Vodka. You can listen to Dan bloviate for several minutes on the company's site, explaining the history of the crystal skulls myth, a collection of carved artifacts that, despite having been proved to be modern fakes, continue to dupe less skeptical fans of the paranormal. I love the man, but there's such a thing as too much willingness to believe. Or perhaps "too much yes, not enough maybe". But whatever! I will be buying at least a couple of bottles of this stuff, despite not really liking vodka at all, just so I can keep a hunk of human head glass around on my shelves. I don't actually know how much the Crystal Head Vodka costs, nor where to buy it, but I suspect it'll be showing up in your local liquor vendor soon — skulls have nearly universal appeal. Crystal Head Vodka product page [ via NOTCOT]
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25 Responses to Crystal Head Vodka may not promote clear thinking

  1. MarkM says:


    John isnt just insane… He’s broke!

    Actual transcript follows:
    “Here’s your check and stock options, Mr. Aykroyd…
    Yes, I’ll just relieve you of that.”
    [takes custody of Aykroyd’s integrity]

    The thing is, if Aykroyd is doing a self-
    parody or attempting a comedic tone (trying to give
    the guy the benefit of the doubt), it’s an abysmal

    If Dan Aykroyd was going to sell out totally,
    couldn’t he find something, anything, better than this?
    And couldn’t he get better ad writers?

    What’s next? “I’m ready for my closeup, Mr. DeMille.”

  2. RikF says:

    $38.95, or $150 from ‘enterprising’ individuals on ebay…

  3. oldtaku says:

    I have to say I would like one of those bottles – what better container for your Precious Bodily Fluids once you’ve drained the skull of the vodka? Just don’t cross the streams.

    The best part of this for me is the ‘filtering’ it with Herkimer Diamonds (which _aren’t even diamonds_, just misnamed quartz) to give it a vanilla flavor.

  4. Beanolini says:

    #13, Garr

    what the hell is Dan Akroyd doing selling vodka?

    Well, Bill Murray sells Japanese Whisky

    Anyone know if this is available in the Old World?

  5. Anonymous says:

    hi-ttime wine cellars in Califonia has it!

  6. 13enster says:

    That is the coolest packaging for booze I have ever seen…


  7. Anonymous says: 38.99 to ca only

  8. diluded000 says:

    I got an acrylic skull mug at the party store last year for Halloween. Used it once for drinking, but now it occupies a place in the metal shop in my garage. Looks cool when hot metal is plunged into it with all the steaming and bubbling. He needs a friend.

  9. Anonymous says:

    If you are looking for the Dan Akroyd Crystal Head Vodka, Chalet Gourmet in San Dimas, CA carries it.

    120 W. Bonita Ave. Suite E
    San Dimas, CA 91773

    House of Fine Spirits, Wine, Beer, Cigars & Gourmet Delights


    Hours of Operation: Tuesday – Saturday 10am – 8pm
    Closed: Sunday & Monday

    Ask for Aline

  10. Garr says:

    I actually watched the whole introductory video.

    But what the hell is Dan Akroyd doing selling vodka?

  11. criffyred says:

    I’ve met Dan Akroyd on a photoshoot for one of his wines. The guys a total douchebag–mean, and cocky as hell. Too bad, I’ll always love Ray Stanz

  12. roundabout says:

    this product is cool and so dan is cool for lending his name to it. and i’m cool for buying it. what’s not cool is trying to find it.

  13. Improbus says:

    This will make the best bong ever. I can’t wait until these bottles start showing up on eBay.

  14. cubey says:

    I’m not a vodka drinker either, but… WANT!

  15. Halloween Jack says:

    There was a discussion of this on MetaFilter; the theory is that it may be viral marketing for the DVD of the latest Indiana Jones movie.

  16. The Lizardman says:

    If the product is unsellable, sell the packaging!

    I’ll be forced to buy at least a couple bottles, I just hope the vodka is good at cleaning drains.

  17. monkeytoesinnose says:

    they sell these bad boys at bevmo… almost bought one, but i HATE vodka

  18. buzzerPV says:

    “Death’s Door Vodka”, named after the death’s door strait which separates Wisconsin’s Washington Island from the Door County peninsula would be the appropriate libation to fill this decanter with.

  19. Anonymous says:

    Not necessarily viral Marketing for the Indy 4 dvd, but perhaps hoping to ride that wave.

    This is not so crazy, as just smart. Some people will pay four times what they should for vodka, if the bottle is cool, for a gift, if not for himself. And if nothing else, he could guarantee the contractors enough sales to make the product worthwhile merely via orders for the House of Blues franchise.

    There is more profit in Vodka with much cheaper packaging design tearing up the market already. Its all about selling the promise of a drunk with reduced hangover. Dan will not lose money on this venture.

    But you can stick to Elvis Decanters if your prefer.

  20. darrylb says:

    It is on their price list for $49.99 SKU 8179

    Doesn’t seem to be anyway to order it directly.

  21. king dead 187 says:

    yeah its not easy to find aparently but in las vegas they sell it at lee’s discount liquor only at lee’s discount liquor not sure if they just bought the contract in las vegas for it or what or if its like that in every city only one liquor has it but i bought it yesturday the bottle has amazing detail every tooth is there it is extreme detail i got it for 54 dollars after tax and shit but i have seen the same shit on the internet for like 259 dollars saying that it is sold out everywhere dont pay that shit you can find it it was sold out where i live in vegas you just have to wait for the next shipment in havent tried the vodka yet though
    king dead187

  22. Blaine says:

    Wow… I guess Akroyd is officially bat shit insane.

  23. artbot says:

    Well, it’s not quite as cool or transparent as the crystal skull, but there are a few interesting decanters you can fill with whatever liquor floats your boat over at Tiki-Farm:

    The “Unlucky Tourist” is a killer deal at only $16. The awesome “Drink Bot” decanter on their home page is only $20. Sadly it looks like the rocketship decanter is sold out, though I bet you can find one on ebay or in select shops that carry Tiki Farm items.

    I have no affiliation with them – just a long time customer.

  24. Blaatann says:

    Impossible to buy in the civilized world..

  25. Blaatann says:

    Sorry.. my post is off course missing my cleverly constructed tongue-in-cheek html tag, because I am a moran..

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