It is hard to imagine a more grotesque children’s cartoon character than SpongeBob SquarePants: a buck toothed idiot man child incarnated into a cube of gasping, asexual jelly. That such a surreal horror could become an icon of cuteness just defines everything I love about the pop culture age we live in.
I mean, look at this SpongeBob Speaker Dock: it is the top of SpongeBob’s skull, lopped off with a butcher’s knife. The brain pan is hollowed: an iPod is inserted. The horrible, alien eyeballs of this subaqueous horror have been wrenched out of their sockets, and against all sense or sanity, function as speakers. It costs $40. And your kid wants one.
Hell, so do I. This is the iPod dock my complete Tiny Tim collection has been waiting for.
Spongebob Squarepants Eyeball Speaker Dock [Nickelodeon]