Know your guido! Your life may depend on it. Look for the tell-tale signs: the torn, skin-tight blue jeans, boxer shorts clearly exposed. The puffy sneakers and sockless ankles. The orange skin and jutting teeth stained with bronzer. The grease-stained bandana. The waxed chest and ruddy areolae. And, of course, the $39.99 beer bladder crammed down the front of the slacks, its long plastic hose snaked suggestively out of the zipper.
Still confused? This is the North American guido’s mating dance, as flaunted on the boardwalks of the New Jersey shore each and every day:
The Beer Belly Beer Dispenser [Foolish Gadgets]
I could only watch 7 seconds of that video before i started gagging. These are the type of people that come to nyc on saturday night to ruin everything.
Jaeger-bombs!
hard to tell from the video but i believe thats not an nj guido as the plumage would indicate that is of the genus guido-statenislandus, a closely related subspecies.
This is also how Security Expert Bruce Schneier gets his liquids greater than 3 oz. past the TSA Checkpoint at the airport.
I fell out of my chair laughing at the video… can someone please explain to me how guys like this think they’re cool?
Waterlilygirl, I suspect alcohol may be involved.
this reminded me of a friend of mine who used to sneak boxed wine into the movie theater by duct-taping the bag to his body.. didn’t look entirely convincing, but it did the trick.
Are these people drinking warm beer?
Philistines!
#5- The Unusual Suspect-
That would be a lot of alcohol all the time… I’m not sure a liver can handle it.
Eh, yo! Who you callin’ douchebag?
Omigod! It’s the Ziggy-Zaggy!
Back when I was in high school (the late 1960′s), our foreign exchange student, Carlos, was from Brazil. At a student assembly, he was called on to demonstrate some of his native culture.
So he, ummm, “danced” something he called the Ziggy-Zaggy. And it was just like the dance in the video above.
And yes, everyone laughed at Carlos, too.
um…how do boys grow up to become this?