Kiss-O-Meter gauges halitosis with cute icons and blinking lights

On the average day, I kiss a lot of people. Young, old, it doesn’t matter… in the dark. Yet I also suffer from bronchial-searing halitosis.

In truth, this was why I originally purchased my budgerigar, Humbert Humbird: a little buddy to trim my nose hairs and pick the mottled skin off my lips most of the time, but whom also played the role of “canary in the mine shaft.” It’s Humbert’s more sterling qualities of dignity and forbearance that have prevented me from cramming him down past my uvula for a whiff like his predecessors.

Thankfully, technology. For only $30 — only a bit more than the price of a budgerigar — you can get a portable Kiss-O-Meter to accurately gauge the stench emanating from the sunken butt of your throat.

Kiss-O-Meter [Urban Outfitters via Geeksugar]

1. [waldeneffect]

   I was wondering how Humbert gets his drinking water?

   I’ve struggled with keeping a supply of clean water for my birds and I finally created a solution I think you might be interested in. I’ve got one for sale on Etsy. It uses a valve system the bird activates with his beak.

   http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=19255817

   Thanks for the healthy dose of humor you seem to squeeze into even all your posts.

2. [Shaddack]

   The smelly chemicals in breath are either nitrogen-based (nitrogen heterocycles, polyamines) or sulfur-based (hydrogen sulfide, low molecular weight alkyl or dialkyl sulfides).

   The price of the gadget suggests some cheap approach; either using a low-specifity sensor (anything volatile organic whether smelly or not), looking for one class only (e.g. looking for sulfur compounds and ignoring amines), or for only one marker chemical (hydrogen sulfide, most likely). Either case will have its advantages and disadvantages; first approach could be prone to false positives, second and third to false negatives, though it may be tailored to work in most common cases and omitting relatively rare disease-caused ones.

3. [elisd]

   Lovely imagery. I wouldn’t normally read a gadget site, but the writing on BBG keeps me clicking over from the motherblog.

4. [sworm]

   Or you can lick the back of the hand and smell that instead. Also quite accurate.

5. [Anonymous]

   I’d be very interested to know what chemical/chemicals the sensor in that thing is picking up, and how accurately. Assuming the widget isn’t pure scam, it is probably the cheapest place to obtain small quantities of a fairly sensitive chemical sensor, it would be nice to know what kind.

6. [nilai3]

   Does it use the same sensor like most air purifier use? Undoubtedly, I believe it works most of the time.

7. [genericvox]

   #3…

   I too, was thinking of the wrong “mineshaft”… My apologies, Mr. Humbird and Mr. Brownlee. I’ve misjudged you.

8. [Ghede]

   #1 Indeed. It brings tears to my eyes, for it reminds me of my old budgie. If only I hadn’t sneezed.

9. [dbarak]

   Gadget? I don’t need no stinkin’ gadget. I have people for that.

10. [pork musket]

    I got my metaphors all mixed and now I’m having terrible thoughts of Humbert spelunking through Brownlee’s mine shaft.

11. [Yep]

    wow – you and that bird just keep getting creepier. it’s rather delightful.