12 things the latest trailer taught me about the new Star Trek

Watch the new trailer in HD (or less!) here.
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34 Responses to 12 things the latest trailer taught me about the new Star Trek

  1. Halloween Jack says:

    There aren’t even any non-pink people there.

    Are you blind?

  2. nehpetsE says:

    The original star trek was optimistically pervy fun with bondage, s&m, and chauvinistic objectification of women.

    Next generation was pc idealism,
    presenting sex as a healthy and oh so
    boring part of a well balanced life.
    (Kind of like being forced to attend Unitarian Universalist sex-ed class with your parents.)

    The J.J.Abrams re-boot appears to be full-blown proto-fascist, Abercrombie&Fitch-styled MAN-on-MAN-MAN-LOVE.

  3. Anonymous says:

    Simon Pegg looks nothing like James Doohan, but as long as Chris Doohan likes him, that’s okay with me.

  4. nehpetsE says:

    The Chrome handle is obviously product placement by the bold look of Kohler.
    “To flush boldly, where no man has flushed before”

  5. Auto Parts for Brains says:

    Am not big Trek fan, but this trailer makes me think it is actually worth seeing on the big screen.

  6. juepucta says:

    My only qualm is with #2 because, any good Trek will have noticed that, in the ST universe “alien” justs means you have a weird forehead and or funky nose. Maaaaybe pointy ears.

    So for all we can gather from that pic a good chunk of that crowd could be alien.


  7. raguero255 says:

    that’s no stick shift!! why the heck do you think Kirk scored so much!?! great preview, Kirk’s dad was a Starship captain?

  8. Anonymous says:

    Ok, I’m sorry… The bit of slow thrusting that we saw in that clip was a little unnecessary. My caption? James T. Kirk doesn’t pull out.

    Yep, I’m sorry.

  9. DeeZed says:

    Chrome stickshift… so this is going to be like ‘Galaxy Quest’ meets ‘ST:TOS’… cool

  10. dougrogers says:

    for 12 minutes

  11. Clay says:

    Joel, did the film before which this trailer ran inspire your use of Futura Condensed in yellow?

  12. dougrogers says:

    I stifled cheer and applause when he sat down in the chair. That would have been so embarrassing

  13. Zarniwoop says:

    That’s one of the best trailers for any film I’ve ever seen.

  14. Bevatron Repairman says:

    I could give a rip about canon, but I will certainly pay $9.75 to see a sequence of folks basejumping a space elevator. I don’t think Vannevar Morgan was quite ready to do that.

  15. misterder says:

    You guys forgot the seemingly derivative Jabba-skiff fight scene with Sulu, and the stupid Kirk as Kal-el plot-point. I can’t reconcile going. The mini-skirts are the only draw for me.

  16. Anonymous says:

    Boo at the faces logo on the site, though. All of them are looking straight ahead… except Uhura who gets a demure 3/4 face angle.


  17. Brainspore says:

    For some reason they didn’t show this trailer at the “Watchmen” screening I saw. PLEASE tell me they brought back the mini-skirts.

  18. Anonymous says:

    Juepecta @31, Paramount already released a pic of an alien that serves (served? will have served?) on the USS Kelvin with George Kirk, and that alien is most definitely not just a guy with rubber bumps on his forehead:


  19. Agies says:

    That’s no stickshift, that’s a goddamned throttle.

  20. devophill says:

    Re: “Black holes are the only way to destroy a planet of ninja”

    Also, Vasquez Rocks will never die.

  21. Dzz says:

    I really hope that there will be at least lot of ‘splosions, instead of a story.

  22. timquinn says:

    That woman needs to be worried about Spock cutting the top of her head off.

  23. rootboy says:

    I am jaded enough to think that you can make a great trailer out of any turd of a movie. I am still looking forward to this film more than any other this year.

    One thing the original series and none of the later ones really captured was the sense that space is a big, scary, mysterious, lonely, and dangerous. I hope this movie retains that feeling without going too far down the path of dark and dour.

  24. cinemajay says:

    I learned that with one trailer, something I was decidedly “meh*” about, has made me more excited than I’ve been for just about any movie in the last 3 years.

  25. phillsmiff says:

    Rootboy is right about trailers being misleading. I watched a short TV show a while back about one of the companies that actually makes the trailers: from what I remember, they are often working from early shots, sometimes without ever having seen the finished film. The film companies need to start promoting the film as early as possible, often before they have even got it all in the can, so we end up with trailers that can’t be anything other than misleading!

    Have you ever watched a trailer for a film and then realised during the film proper that the trailer had stuff in it that wasn’t in the final film? This is why.

    All that said, whoever made the trailer for ST really knows their craft because by the end I was super excited to see the film.

  26. mongo says:

    Aliens? It looks like a Mormon Tabernacle crowd. There aren’t even any non-pink people there.

  27. DeeZed says:


  28. Anonymous says:

    Damn you Michael Bay!

  29. dimmer says:

    Re: Starfleet accepts aliens, but not many — well, at this point in time they’ve not met all that many of them I guess.

  30. Anonymous says:

    Did you catch the size of Uhuru’s earpiece!

  31. xzzy says:

    I’m more revved up for this than the Watchmen movie. This flick seems like it was genetically engineered to make me unable to resist it.

    It’s got bad guys who are easy to hate, lots of psuedo-science, and explosions. They even managed to secure a cast of people who were pretty much unknown 5 years ago, each of whom I’ve always felt deserved more.

    Really, what’s not to like.

  32. Jack says:

    This looks like nice eye candy, but the dourness/darkness is a real turn-off.

    There was a pervading sense of gleeful optimism that winded it’s way through the original Star Trek world that seems missing from all of these clips/discussions of this J.J. Abrams “reboot” of the series.

  33. lava says:

    13. The Enterprise has a big chrome stick shift!

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