The Grand Moff’s wine cooler

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Kalorik has a new wine cooler out. It is their first to meet ANSI specifications for use aboard the Death Star. From the pitch:

It comes with 2 wireless temperature probes that you insert into uncorked bottles, sealing the spout of the bottle while sending accurate temperature readings of the liquid itself (not the bottle) to the LCDs on the outside of the chiller. Also, you can have the bottle out of the chamber (on the dinner table, let’s say) and the probe transmits the temperature to the base unit wirelessly. The chiller will alert you when the wine has become to warm and it’s time to put it back in the chamber. The unit also has a “quick freeze” option to chill Champaign as quickly as in the freezer. It allows you to simultaneously chill a bottle of red, white, rosé or champagne.

Kalorik Wine Cooler [Kalorik]

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26 Responses to The Grand Moff’s wine cooler

  1. caipirina says:

    is it friday already ???

  2. monstrinho_do_biscoito says:

    we used to leave bottles in the wine cooler in my local supermarket, knowing they would freeze and crack. ho de ho

  3. dole says:

    chill “Champaign”??

    Who’s this marketed towards, The Continental?

  4. Madmolf says:

    @PaulR and @JosephLRC : You are right, i live in the french countryside, and it’s true that most houses will have a fixed temp of 18°C/19°C (64,4°F/66,2°F). I don’t know if this is the reason the wine is chilled over your place.

    As for white wine, pffft, it’s served chilled because most would taste awfull otherwise, although some nice fruity whites can be great.
    The “quick freeze” option sounds great, because there are rarely more than two bottles of champagne in the fridge at a time, and it runs out quickly.
    Maybe they could have a cheap one with only the “quick freeze”.

  5. clockwork says:

    frivolous and redundant

  6. Anonymous says:

    Room temperature’s not what it used to be though, and what used to pass as room temperature is now cooler than most people are used to due to good new insulation and radiators. Red wine should be chilled a bit. FACT.

  7. PaulR says:

    MadMolf: Lemme see, in the Winter, I set the room temperature to 17°C in my office during the day.

    During off-use time (nights), the thermostats drop the temperature to 15°C. The bedroom: cold room, warm bed.

    So, what you’re (well, me too) saying is that this is the perfect time and place to have a glass of wine! À ta santé!

  8. PaulR says:

    Um, room temperature if your house is in the countryside in France.

    Somewhere around 13-17 degC.

  9. Madmolf says:

    @PaulR : Spot on, à la tienne.

  10. Halloween Jack says:

    Aren’t bottles of wine supposed to be stored on their sides, or even cork down a little, so that the cork doesn’t dry out and ruin the wine?

  11. thechicgeek says:

    Umm…shouldn’t red wine be served at room temperature? In fact, I’ve never had chilled red wine. I can only imagine what that awful swill would taste like. Blegh!

  12. josephlrc says:

    Generally an unheated house in the French countryside- but directly from the cellar- your temperature ratings are great, but hard for Americans to understand- at least this one, and an HVAC engineer to boot. Sad I know.

    As for white, pfft. great! more for me! Though frankly, I think most people drink it too cold. Let it warm a bit and see if you like it more.

  13. zuzu says:

    Opulent.

  14. mokey says:

    i like my red wine chilled because it’s easier to chug that way. and i prefer it in carlo rossi bottles for economy, ease of transportation, the general merriment of passing a jug of rotgut around a room, and most importantly, price.

  15. seaanemoneman says:

    Uh, is this another Atari joystick mashup?

  16. Rob Beschizza says:

    It is always Friday on the Death Star.

  17. dculberson says:

    You will get to the joystick usage after consuming both bottles of wine.

  18. DSMVWL THS says:

    Quick freeze? Can it encase my wine in carbonite?

  19. ZoopyFunk says:

    I’ll take my red at room temp, thanks. And white? Pffft.

  20. phillamb168 says:

    Just chiming in to agree with everybody else who said, “chilled red wine? EGAD.”

    But yes, your 1999 bottle of Corton Charlemagne Grand Cru Villamont should be “chilled” in so much as you bring it down to cellar temp, but you need to do it gradually. I would never, ever use this “rapid chill” feature or whatever it is. Also, a question: does one decant after this, or should you decant and then put the probe in the thing?

  21. phillamb168 says:

    Yes, I did just reference a Chardonnay when talking about red wine. Wanna fight about it?

  22. liamo says:

    Why do they have two bottles of red in the cooler?

    I was under the impression that red should be served at room temperature

  23. Signal30 says:

    Red wine over ice is even tastier.

  24. Rob Beschizza says:

    Not on the Death Star.

  25. krylon says:

    upon seeing this post in reduced form, I thought that was a joystick of some kind. Imagine my disappointment.

  26. phillamb168 says:

    Ok, actually I sit around drinking Pabst all day. This would be good for that.

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