What office worker wouldn’t love this machine from Tokyo’s Nakabayashi company, which converts regular office paper into toilet paper. The $95,000 machine, which is designed to be kept in an office, coverts 1,800 sheets of A4 paper into two rolls of toilet paper, which seems really out of whack, buy maybe Japanese toilet paper is much thicker than our flimsy Western 2-ply.
You wouldn’t wipe your ass with a report like this—but you could.
Get a Government job!
No, toilet paper is very much still used over there. It’s also not provided in many public bathrooms, from what I’ve heard.
Neat. But why does it only take covert documents?
That headline should either be, “Convert documents to toilet paper[..]” or “Covert documents as toilet paper[..]” perhaps.
I think it makes 2 paper rolls per hour, and takes up to 1,800 sheets of paper for that purpose, albeit it provably runs for a long time out of that paper. It’s 7,2 Kg of paper, after all.
What does it do with the staples?
@#4 HEAVYD14
It converts standard staples into ass-rending staples. Voila!
This would explain the extremely low quality of most Japanese toilet paper- it’s made from recycled TPS reports.
Seriously, Japanese toilet paper is terrible. It’s like wiping your ass with fine sandpaper. You know that really shitty (as in quality) institutional 1-ply stuff thats like a tissue cut in half with sand mixed in? Yeah, that’s most consumer brand toilet paper in Japan. Only one brand over there, Pure, even comes close to the basic low-average American softness level.
And yes, many “bathrooms” don’t carry toilet paper- it’s expected of you to bring your own. I’m not joking. There is a reason they are always handing out tissue packets with ads on them- commuters typically carry one in a pocket at all times when out in case of having to use a non-paper bathroom.
And I thought the ex-marine I met before I went over was joking about having to use your socks in an emergency…. turns out, he wasn’t, and it was only after living there for nearly 3 years that I realized he must have done just that many times…
H. Jack, even with a bidet you still need to wipe. Otherwise you pull your pants up on a soggy and still dirty netherworld.
I need a machine that converts my used toilet paper into documents.
I thought that the Japanese were in favor of bidet-type jets of water that directed soothing, cleansing fountains at their nethers, in lieu of bogroll. (I mean, I could guess that most of their crappers didn’t have built-in sound effects to mask the noise of elimination, or blood-sugar gauges or what have you, but still.)
Gives a whole new meaning to TPS reports.