Amazon reader reviews of Denon's $500 scam cable are brilliant

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Denon's $500 ethernet cable, ostensibly for use in Denon Link hookups, is easy to mock. But it's Amazon's readers who mock the hardest:

"If I could use a rusty boxcutter to carve a new orifice in my body that's compatible with this link cable, I would already be doing it. I can just imagine the pure musical goodness that would flow through this cable into the wound and fill me completely -- like white, holy light."

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“A caution to people buying these: if you do not follow the ‘directional markings’ on the cables, your music will play backwards. Please check that before mentioning it in your reviews.”

"The first time I downloaded a picture to the printer over this cable, the bits moved so fast the printer collapsed into a naked singularity, right there in my office.”

"I accidentally dropped one end of my Denon cable into a glass of Tuscan whole milk I was drinking. Later when I finished my milk (yeah, I still drank it; should I not have done that?), my right arm (lost in an accident in 1987) spontaneously grew back.
Is that normal?"

This is perhaps the best Amazon reviews page of all time. Don't miss it, or the tags customers associate with this product, which include "from the future," "I can't believe it's not butter," "as effective as dog hair," "ecstacy godlike troll-killing superWMD ubercable," and "lol."

Denon AKDL1 Dedicated Link Cable reader reviews [Amazon via Newsvine via CrunchGear]

About Rob Beschizza

Follow Rob @beschizza on Twitter.
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